feeling a sudden surge of
emptiness - what have i achieved these past years?
loneliness - scrolling through whatsapp and i can't find anyone to talk to.
smallness - is she better?
bitterness - she is better.
helplessness - i don't know what to do.
sadness - because you realise happiness is fleeting.

time of the month must be approaching...

anyway i hate it i hate how i cant seem to be able to remember the places i have been and the things i have done on these wonderful trips i made. i make it a point to absorb and really try to just feel a place. to close my eyes and listen. to open my eyes and see. but when anyone asks me "how's (destination)?" I AM STUMPED. i talk about the weather because... that's actually the only thing that's at the top of my head. that would probably not waste too much of your need-to-make-small-talk, why-not-i-pretend-to-be-interested-in-your-holiday time. #FMYMEMORY

and tbh, i dont really listen when people i dont really know talk about their own trips especially during occasions when we have to socialise. 90% of the time i am mentally telling myself to concentrate on what you're saying. i stare at your lips they are moving but i dont hear anything but blah blah blah blah wordcapture blah blah. the other 10%, i try NOT to stare at your lips and look into your eyes because i remembered someone once told me eye contact is important. freak, is that being awkward???

Labels: #exchangeineurope